This weekend I'm back in Wilsondale. (AKA Middle of Nowhere) I was actually really glad to see my mom, brother, and grandma when they came to pick me up. It has been two full months since I last went home to visit so I was actually (kinda) looking forward to this trip home. I talked to my dad on the phone earlier and he was in a good mood. He got a small raise at work.
Of course, the fun trip home turned not so fun when something on the radio brought up the gays. My mom launched into one of her rants about how she doesn't like gay people and blah blah blah. Then Britney came on the radio which got my mom started on the song 'If U Seek Amy' and how she hates it. The ride home gave me a headache.
It's things like this that keep me from telling her that I'm gay. Sometimes it seems like she'd handle the news fine (she wouldn't be ok with it, but she wouldn't disown me either). Then there are the times when it seems like the first thing she'd want to do would be to cry or something. Anyway, I'm getting more and more frustrated with having to pretend to be someone I'm not around her. (She only mentioned me getting a girlfriend like 4 times during the trip home.)
Now that I'm back at my house it makes me realize how much I like life in the city more. Don't get me wrong, this is where I grew up and there are a lot of good memories here, I just like it better in the city. I miss my stupid dorm room and my bed. I went to sleep at 10pm (there's nothing to do here, don't look at me like that.) and only slept for around 4 hours.
I'm leaving here in a couple hours to go back to my old High School so I can get this form signed to do my Level 1 Clinicals there. I'm looking forward to seeing my little brothers and cousins getting on the bus.
I find myself hoping that this weekend goes well. I'm sure that I'll enjoy spending time with my mom and dad as long as no one says the word gay.